Maquese Chriss: Lucky to be alive

It almost happened. Kristaps Porzingis almost took a life last night against the Phoenix Suns. Maquese Chriss are you out of your damn mind? Stepping to the Latvian Lieutenant? Your odds of surving that encounter were lower than surviving a grizzly bear attack. Classic case of “Let me try to make a name for myself by going after a popular player”. We all know the old adage, “If your going to shoot for the King, you better kill him”. Marquese Chriss you better make peace with God and tell all your family members you love them, because you made an enemy out of the baddest man on the planet. You’re lucky your head is still on your shoulders.  

Lets break this play down. Knicks are moving the ball up the court to execute a play that was probably going to result in points because the Suns STINK. Porzingis and Bledsoe get tangled up in mid-court during the transition. How could you not get tangled up with Kristaps? The kid looks like Dr.Otto Octavius out there. As the two begin to separate, Marquese Chriss takes in upon himself to push Kristaps when he is already off balance. At this point I feared the worse for Mr.Chriss.

Let the frenzy ensue. Look at the rage in those eyes. Rather, look at the fear in the eyes of every other person in that picture. Joakim Noah looks absolutely frightened. Did you see how fast the stadium security was on that floor? Instantly. They knew what could of happened had it not been for their quick action. The 6God had a decision to make,”Let him live or take his head clean off of his shoulders?”. Luckily, Kristaps is merciful. Understanding that there were children in the crowd, he spared Chriss’ life. Knicks might of lost but Porzingis dropped 29, which is probably more points that Marquese Chriss has scored in his career.

Moving forward, Marquese Chriss’ best bet is moving far,far away. Probably should change his name and get out of this hemisphere. We all know Kristaps is the kind of guy to hold a grudge. Booed on draft night and said “guess ill have to be the best basketball players of all time now”. He still hears those boos. KP always gets his way. 

NFL Week 14 Fantasy Breakouts and Busts

With most fantasy leagues starting their playoffs either last week or this week, fantasy football players around the country needed big performances from their star players. Below is a list of the biggest breakouts and busts from the QB, RB, WR, and TE positions during yesterday’s games.

Quarterback Breakout: Aaron Rodgers: Rodgers threw for 246 yards and 3 touchdowns against the Seattle Seahawks defense. That alone is impressive in itself. Even crazier, the guy didnt play the in the last 10 minutes of the game. Rodgers is a freak. I feel like he loses on purpose to get people to doubt him, just to turn it around and throw it in their face.  If this guy stays hot the entire NFC is in trouble.

Quarterback Bust: Russell Wilson: The Seattle Seahawks offense looked like a limp penis yesterday. Wilson threw 5 interceptions, and accumulated 209 yards in the blow out lose to the Packers. I hate the Seahawks, so if Earl Thomas’ injury is the beginning of their downfall, so be it. Wilson on the other hand must of screwed over millions of fantasy owners. Thanful hes not on my roster. 

Running Back Breakout: Leveon Bell: The Steelers offense torched the Buffalo Bills yesterday and about 95% of the torching was done by Bell. 3 rushing touchdowns, 236 yards on the ground and 62 recieving yards on 4 receptions. The 3 week suspension was worth the wait for those who drafted Bell in the summer. If you have him on your team, odds are you won yesterday. 

Running Back Bust: Melvin Gordon: Not much you can do about an injury. Im sure alot of fantasy owners were relying on a big day from this guy. Didnt even have the chance to scrounge up a single point. A real kick in the balls from the injury riddled San Diego Chargers.

Wide Receiver Breakout: TY Hilton: TY is one of the most consistent receivers in the league. Luck and Hilton have great chemistry and if your lucky enough to have TY on your fantasy team, you see it in his numbers week in and week out. Yesterday, Hilton had 9 receptions for 115 yards and a touchdown. A fantasy owners wet dream.

Wide Receiver Bust: Dez Bryant: In the words of life long Giants fan George Schmidt “Janoris Jenkins took Dez out to the woodshed”. Cant help but agree. Bryant had 1 catch for 10 yards and lost a fumble on a crucial 4th quarter drive. Maybe if he wasnt busy mucking it up with Jay-Z pregame he could of focused on his fundamentals. His poor judgment reflected on the scoreboard. 

Tight End Breakout: Travis Kelce:  On Thursday night Kelce reeled in 5 catches for 101 yards. Although this guy is a total tool bag, im giving him this weeks breakout over Tyler Eifert for the mocking of Marquette King after Tyreek Hill’s punt return. Was in the right place at the right time and executed perfectly. That kind of stuff can catapult your team into a playoff run.

Tight End Bust: Coby Fleener: This guy is the most inconsistent human on the planet. Hes either on fire or frozen solid. 1 reception for 6 yards. Jeez. Leave it up to a guy with the first name “Coby” to screw your fantasy team that hard. The Saints offense had a rough day all around and Fleener was a key contributor. 

Tonight the Ravens take on the Patriots. A game that involves a ton of key fantasy players. Legarette Blount, Julian Edleman, Joe Flacco, and Steve Smith. Bold Prediction: Ravens walk away from this game with a 24-21 win. Justin Tucker with a 56 yard game winning field goal. Over/under is set at 44.5. Bet the over and your sure to be a winner. Good luck to everyone moving on to next week in fantasy playoffs.

SNF Analysis/Prediction: Cowboys v Giants

Tonight, the NFC East rivalry between the Cowboys and Giants is renewed. The first place, 11-1 Cowboys, take on the second place, 8-4 Giants, at Metlife Stadium. The Cowboys have already clinched a playoff spot and are aiming to clinch the division with a win tonight. The Giants, on the other hand, are currently holding an NFC wild card spot and are  looking to derail the best team in the NFL with a big win tonight. Expect superstars Ezekiel Elliot, Dez Bryant, and Odell Beckham to play a big role in the outcome of tonights game. This is guaranteed to be an exciting matchup.

The Giants enter this game coming off of a tough loss to the Steelers. Although it may not of shown last week, the Giants defense has proven to be one of the stronger defenses in the  NFL. Rising stars Landon Collins and Olivier Vernon have shown that they have the ability to change games at the drop of a hat. The Giants offense has been able to produce points through the use of their passing game. Sterling Sheppard has complimented Odell Beckham nicely, allowing Beckham to maintain his high levels of productivity. When Eli is a having a good day, these two are the beneficiaries. The entire league has been watching the young Dallas rookies, Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliot win tough games all year. Tonight, these two will face a rowdy Giants crowd that will definitley amplify the play of the New York defense. It will be up to Elliot and Prescott to control the pace of the game and set the tone early if the Cowboys want to walk away with the W. Prescott and Elliot cannot do it by themselves though. Dez Bryant, Cole Beasley and Jason Witten, as usual, will all need to contribute tonight; as the Cowboys will need to put forth a full team effort.

Prediction: Its never easy predicting the outcome of a rivalry game. Both teams have something to play for and are going to pull out all the stops tonight. Dallas is favorited (-3.5) and the over/under is 46.5. I have the Giants winning tonight by a score of 33-30, on a Robbie Gould field goal as time expires. The difference is this game is going to be the Giants offense. Although Prescott and Elliot will share a couple touchdowns each, the Giants offense will produce just a little bit more, edging out a close victory in a hard fought game. If the Cowboys do win tonight, it might be time for me to consider them serious Super Bowl contenders. Player of the game: Will Tye: 6 receptions, 78 yards, 2 touchdowns. Enjoy the game, bet the over.

New York Jets QB Situation

Believe it or not, a handful of people have reached out to me asking about my thoughts on what the Jets should do moving forward at the quarterback position. Jets fans are nuts. Ill straight up admit that. Even when Mark Sanchez led the team to back to back AFC championship games people were calling for his head. I know, I know, “The Jets defense got them there, not Sanchez”. All im saying is if you go back and watch highlights from those runs, Sanchez threw a ton of great passes. Damn i’m still holding on to those years. Anyway, the Jets are now caught in between giving Bryce Petty a shot, taking a gamble on Hackenberg, or pursuing a QB with an early draft pick. We all know Fitzpatrick is gone. Would of been better of giving that $12 million dollars to charity. So what are the Jets to do now?

The Bryce Petty situation is a mess. Although hell be getting the nod in these last 4 games, the guy hasn’t really had a fair shot. Other than his one start, most of his playing time has come in the 2nd half of blowouts. In my opinion, the Jets have to handle this situation in one of two ways. Drop two of the three QBs they will have after this season (Petty, Smith, Hackenberg) and draft a quarterback, or drop one of the three and name one of the remaining two as your starter the day that training camp begins. Nothing tears a team or organization apart more than a “quarterback competition”. I hate even thinking about it. Look how well it worked out for Jared Goff and the Rams. If your going to try to establish a franchise quarterback, you have to back him from day one. Quarterback competitions are a recipe for producing headcases. We saw it first hand when the Jets brought in Tebow. Sanchez is still recovering.

Personally, I think the Jets should pursue Deshaun Watson and keep Hackenberg as a backup. Why; you ask. Why the hell not. Watson is an ACC quarterback whose shown he can play well against some of the strongest defenses in college football, including Alabama. I cant tell if hes a better runner or passer. Probably the one guy in this draft that has the potential to make an immediate impact. Dont get me wrong, I think Geno Smith has potential to be a decent quarterback in this league. But a torn ACL is a huge setback, especially for a guy who heavily relys on his running ability. As for Petty, he’s been around to long and just isnt as valuable to us as he once was. We can’t drop Hackenberg after taking him in the second round last April. 

There it is. Good riddance Fitz. Drop Petty and Geno. Draft Watson and have Hackenberg back him. The worst thing the Jets can do is draft Watson and not declare him as our starter. Good God you know its going to happen. I guess well just have to sit back and see how the Jets screw up this one up in the off season.

Knicks v Cavs Recap: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Might of let the hype of the New York Knicks get to my head just a little bit. Thinking they were going to beat the Cavs last night was a bit of been a stretch, but damn, I didn’t think things were going to get that ugly. Sure, offensively we were missing D.Rose at the point guard position, but boy was our defense shitty. That game looked like the first half of the Monstars vs. The Toon Squad. Here are some of the takeaways from last night.

Good: Not too much good to take out of a 32 point loss, but things could of gone worse I suppose. The first positive take-away from last night is that anyone who took my advice and bet the over was a winner. I don’t  throw “mortal locks” out there too often, but when I do, your 99.9% sure to be in the money. Secondly, I was happy to see Brandon Jennings be able to play a pretty decent game replacing Rose. Brandon led the Knicks in scoring with 16 points and shot 42% from the field. Anyone whose paid attention to the NBA for the past 5 years knows that Derrick Rose can self destruct at any moment. Its important for Jennings to stay prepared at all times to be our starting PG.

Bad: What I wanted to see last night was the Knicks compete with the best team in the East. Even with a loss, a close game could give the team and fans something to hold on to. The season is still early and chemistry is built over time. Hopefully last night was just a combination of a championship team with great chemistry, against a team thats still learning how to play together. I was definitely not happy with Lance Thomas’ performance in his return to the court. Chucked up some questionable shots and lacked physicality.  Im sure as he gets more games under his belt hell be back bounding and astounding.

Ugly: Ive seen better perimeter defense played in CYO. The Knicks allowed the Cavs to put up shots from behind the arc, uncontested, all night long. Cleveland shot 22-40 from three point range. Thats pretty fucking ridcoulous. If the Knicks want to be taken seriously in the East their going to need to start getting a little nasty on the defesive side of the ball. Again, the chemistry factor also applies to defense, but where is the great Joakim Noah that we paid 72 million dollars for? Isnt nastiest the only thing he really contributes. That ugly bastard. 

Knicks face off against the Kings tomorrow night. Well see how they come out after a demoralizing loss. Hopefully they can get back on the winnig side of things and keep this train a rollin. #Knickstape

Cavs v Knicks: Who ya got?

Ill tell you who I have, I have the goddamn, 4 wins in a row, New York Knickerbockers. Have you seen this team play at MSG? Derrick Rose playing in Madison Square Garden is like Marcus Aurelies fighting in the Coliseum. Ive been watching Sportscenter all day and who have theyve been talking about? Wow, what a suprise, Lebron James! They never talk about that guy! Hate him to my core. Traitor, sellout, among a long line of other things.

Let me give you a behind the scenes of what was not covered on Sportscenter today. First, and foremost, the New York Knicks posses a 21 year old, 7 foot 3 inch, Latvian unicorn. Kristaps Porzingis has done nothing but live up to the hype to start his sophmore season. Hes averaging 20.2 points per game,7.6 rebounds, and is the first 7 footer in NBA history to average over 2 three-pointers per game. Not to mention his handy side kick, a man who now goes by the nickname “Black Irish”. What a pleasent suprise Kyle O’Quinn has been for this team. Tough on the boards,reliable from mid range, and a pretty good defender. Although Noah was one of our big signings this off season, it seems like the Knicks are playing better with O’Quinn in the lineup.

Heres a public service announcement to all NBA analysts and ESPN personalities: Never, EVER, disrespect Carmelo Anthony again. God damn you guys really did it this time. You went on pissing the man off and here he is, throwing it in your face. “Not his team anymore”, “Time to retire”, “Not top ten”. Averaging 23 points per game, and a couple game winners under his belt to start the 2016 season. Melo back to being the pure shooter that he is. 

The energy is back in MSG, as the Knicks fanbase is starting to realize this team can be a contender in the East. The Cavs are favorite -7.5 tonight, and the over/under is 198.5. My advice, per usual, bet the over. Tonight I declare the over a MORTAL LOCK, due to the fact that Kristaps is dropping 48 points. Stay tuned for my post game analysis tomorrow. 

Jimbo’s Top Ten: Christmas Movies

Im gearing up for the controversy this post is gonna spark. Everybody loves Christmas movies, but typically, things tend to get a tad controversial when ordering them from best to worst. Below are my top 10 favorite Christmas movies of all time.

10) Polar Express: The Polar Express is one of the most comforting movies a person could watch during the holiday season. Tom Hanks plays the voice of just about every character and does a great job doing it. Im assuming this movie cracks everybodys top 10. The only reason its in the #10 spot on my list is because the animations are kind of freaky looking. Not a big fan of the “caribou on the tracks” scene either. Those two clutsy conductors shouldnt be driving that train in the first place and should have their licenses revoked immediately.

9) The Santa Clause: I feel like the only reason this movie is popular is because abc family, or whatever the hell they call it now, plays it 500+ times during “25 days of Christmas”. No other notable films are coming to mind right now that star Tim Allen, so ill say this is his best work. His wife was such a bitch in this movie and he throws it right in her face by taking Charlie for a joy ride in his sleigh on Christmas Night; proving he is the favorite out of the divorced parents.

8) Frosty the Snowman: Cant hold Frosty down for long. One of the most lovable characters of Christmas folk lore. Impossible to not have a smile on your face when Frosty has the neighborhood kids in an uproar. Also impossible to not have a tear in your eye when Frosty has to dip out because the tempurature is rising. 

7) How the Grinch Stole Christmas: I know we all love firing up the cartoon version on Christmas Eve, but on this list im regarding Jim Carrey’s performance as the Grinch in the 2000 hit comedy. Jeez this movie came out in 2000. How old do you feel right now? I was five years old. Just another testament to how good of a movie this really is. I find this movie just as funny now as I did when I was five years old. Jim Carrey’s humor is universal. Impossible to watch this movie and not laugh.

6) A Christmas Story: When I watch this movie I watch it in bulk. TBS shows this movie on a 24 hour loop on Christmas Eve and I can guarantee you that after the Lettieri family gorges themselves around the dinner table, were plopping our asses on the couch and throwing on TBS for at least two little Ralphie go rounds. The leg lamp, the bunny costume, and the red ryder bb gun. Classic scenes that cannot be matched.

5) National Lampoons Christmas Vacation: Chevy Chase in his prime. Hard to beat. I too often hear “Ive never seen it”, come out of the mouths of members of my generation. Well if you’re one of those people, drop everything you’re doing and put it on right now. The Griswold family is too entertaining. The combination of obnoxious cousin eddie mixed with perpetual misfortune and disorganization is relatable for families all over the country.

4) Home Alone: Kevin Mcallister is one of the greatest minds of our time. The trap creations he has put forth should make him eligible to win a nobel peace prize. Whats better than watching Marv and Harry continously eat shit and get outsmarted by Macaulay Culkin. Nothing. Guess the “wet bandits” got the last laugh though, as it seems Macaulay is now addicted to heroine. Oh well, I bet the actor that played Fuller is succesful as fuck.

3) Santa Clause is Coming to Town: This is where things start to get serious. No more messing around with the comedies about Christmas. The Rankin and Bass films are probably the purest Christmas movies you can find. From the singing to the dancing to the story line. Just the old tale of Kris Kringle saving Christmas. Has there ever been a better antagonist than Bugermeister Meisterburger? Win, lose, or draw, thats the kind of name that gets you places in life.

2) Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: Another Bass and Rankin classic I watched growing up. I can still hear the noise Rudolph’s nose made when it lit up. Rudy might take the cake for best Christmas character ever created (sorry Frosty). His song is fire, hes a true underdog, and now all the other reindeers  are on his D because hes leading them to the promised land. Blitzen wasnt a day one, dasher wasnt a day one, comet wasnt a day one, but Clarice was there. Im sure shes reaping the benefits. Yukon Cornelius is a stud by the way.

1) Elf: The undisputed champ. Unbeatable. Everyone has seen it so im not gonna give much of a summary. Seen this movie an infinite amount of times and still crack up whenever I watch it. The first time I saw this movie was at Commack cinemas and the entire theater was pissing their pants. If a genie came out if a bottle and granted me one wish I would wish to be able to see Elf for the first time again. Definitely a movie I cant wait to show to my kids one day. Will Ferrell made syrup,spaghetti, and candy look appetizing. Could of won an oscar for this performance. “But the children love the books”, iconic. 

2016 New York Jets: The Nightmare Continues

Things are worse than I thought, much worse. It looks like the New York Jets are entering the dark ages again. Last night’s performance against the Colts was embarrassing. Really, really, really bad football. Offense, defense, special teams; it did not seem like a single player in a Jets uniform wanted to be out there. Here’s my issue with this team. They are not this bad. We saw that last week against the Patriots. The Jets gave a top three team in the NFL a tough game last Sunday. But last night, took the field with the mentality that they had some place better to be. It has gone beyond the point of being a “bad team”. The New York Jets have an organizational philosophy issue.

Woody Johnson, this next paragraph is dedicated to you and you only. While you’re  mucking it up in your owners box with Vice President elect: Mike Pence, youre fan base is suffering. Time to flip this organization upside down. Mr. Woody Johnson I am begging you with every inch of my tar black soul to SELL THE TEAM. You have remained the only constant and to be brutally honest, nobody wants you here. Please have a moment of self realization and accept that fact that you STINK as an NFL owner.  We all hate you, sincerely Jets Nation.

Moving forward its time to build a new philosophy within this organization. Do I know what that philosophy is? No, I have zero idea. But when you are known as one of the hisorically bad teams in the NFL and nothing is changing, the only step you can take is instilling a new way for the organization to operate, on the field and off. Jets fans deserve so much better than what we are getting; one of the most passionate fan bases in the NFL. I shouldnt want to be thrown in a wood chipper every time I watch a game. Time to get better as both a team and organization. #JetUp

MLB: Mets Trade Rumors and More

After the re-signing of Yoenis Cespedes, the New York Mets are looking into shaping the rest of their roster to accomodate the superstar. With the team looking forward to finally having a full season equipt with their young and talented pitching staff, the Mets could be dangerous with the addition of extra bats and a decent bullpen.

 Curtis Granderson and Jay Bruce, two left handed batters, are believed to be two big trade pieces for the Mets to give up for some bullpen depth. Orioles right handed reliever Brad Brach is currently at the top of the Mets wish list, according to Buster Olney. Over his past 158 1/3 innings, Brach has flashed a 2.39 ERA, which makes Granderson or Bruce a longshot to be the deal maker. 

Although Bruce ended the regular season on a hot streak, I would much rather see the Mets deal him over Granderson. With the amount of young  outfield talent the Mets are hoarding in Conforto, Nimmo and Lagares, I dont believe the team can afford to lose a guy like Curtis. Pure chemistry player; when Granderson is playing good, the whole team is playing good. This guy launches a lead off homerun once a week. With Jose now batting in the lead off spot, I like Grandy following up in the 2 hole. We’ve seen Jay at his best and weve seen Jay at his worst. Personally, ive always been a big fan of Jay Bruce, but if he’s the guy that has to go to fix that MESS of a bullpen were dealing with, so be it. 

For the most part the Mets should enter the 2017 season as deep playoff contenders. I need the Mets to win the World series for obvious reasons, but the biggest reason is because I believe a World Series can send David Wright into retirement. One of the greatest Mets ever, definitely of my childhood; Wright’s 8 year, $138 million contract is holding the Mets franchise under and pillow and suffocating it untill it stops fighting. Love the guy to death, but his time is up. Spinal stenosis is not cured, its dealt with, and as time passes it begins harder and harder to manage.

Lets send D.W. off the right way with a World Series championship. Build the bullpen, find some extra bats, drop the sausage and peppers price about .50 cents and you can bet ill be at Citi Field a whole lot this summer. Syndergaard, Harvey, Degrom, Matz, Wheeler. Cue in the bad guy from Taken, “good luck”.

Bowl Mania: A glimpse at the College Football Playoff

With yesterday being selection Sunday, we have an official College Football playoff bracket. On December 31st, the #1 seeded Alabama Crimson Tide will face off against the #4 ranked Washington Huskies in the “Chick-fil-A Peach Bowl”. Across the bracket, #2 seeded Clemson will play #3 ranked Ohio State in the “Playstation Fiesta Bowl”. Before I really dive into any of this, how ridiculous are this year’s sponsors. Chick-fil-A and Playstation? Don’t get me wrong i’m a supporter of both corporations, the Bowl titles just sound a little bizarre is all. “Chick-fil-A: Peach Bowl”. The NCAA might of just introduced a new first ballot food combo; chicken and peaches actually sounds quite refreshing.

Although this post will not include any predictions it will cover my opinions on these two games. Alabama is going to absoloutely massacare Washington. Not even going to waste my time tuning in. The NCAA was better off letting Penn State into that #4 seed souly due to the fact that Penn State has defeated another team in the bracket. Although I see Bama cruising into the national championship, I always pick against an undefeated team in the big game. What fun is it rooting for the team who hasn’t lost yet? Always been a fan of an underdog story. Plus, no matter what, ill always remember Saban as the shitty Miami Dolphins coach he once was. Trust me, shitty Coach Saban is so much more entertaining than dominant Coach Saban. I see Deshaun and the Tigers getting some sweet revenge, but ill save that for my prediction piece. 

Really wish the College playoff bracket was a tad more intricate. When I first heard about the installment of this system I envisioned more of a March Madness kind of set up. Obviously I didnt imagine the bracket to be as large as the March Madness bracket, but the “four teams only” deal is kind of lame. What about six teams? Or  seven teams and the #1 see gets a bye?Whatever, I dont think the NCAA will be taking my advice anytime soon. Gonna go cook up some chicken and peaches.